27.3.06

Megaphoning pub-speak in Germany

Moving away from the BNC (maybe forever since I doubt folks are keen on hearing what the panels were on, though I still want to talk about the last panel I was at. I'll spring that upon yous, like a roaring lion, some day when yous least expect it) and back to that subject close to my heart. No, not arteries but Germany 2006.

The latest news is: "German police are planning to calm nerves among fans at this year's World Cup by using officers specially trained in pub-speak to communicate through megaphones."

This means scenarios like: "We are taking your beer bottle away from you. Slowly" followed by undignified tussles for the bottles will probably be common.

Unfortunately a very small proportion of the fans will understand this since the police plan to do their explaining over a loudspeaker "using colloquial language and humour, albeit mostly in German".

German humour (do I hear cries of "what's that?"), police loudspeakers and drunken footy fans. Even without football, I can already predict success for Germany 2006.

4 Comments:

At 3/28/2006 12:15 AM, Blogger Elizabeth said...

Hey, Germans can be very humorous. They invented Leiderhosen, after all. What's funnier than old men in leather shorts?

 
At 3/28/2006 12:44 PM, Blogger Priya said...

I would love to see how the training on "pub speak" works, btw.

Imagine DC police folks being trained to "talk like anarchist protesters" during the annual World Bank/IMF/Anti-war protests.

 
At 3/31/2006 7:22 PM, Blogger Elizabeth said...

Heh. "Dudes, look, I know you're all, like, stressed out and shit. But really, we've all got to just ch-ill."

Yes, I think all protestors sound like Pauly Shore.

 
At 3/31/2006 10:38 PM, Blogger Priya said...

Or, "Yes, well, we're aware we're representing a fascist state which takes away all your civil liberties but, hey man, we're just doing our job. Peace"

(takes protester away in handcuffs)

 

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